Denny Noward says you might be an addicted to cycling if —

Getting the "win" at city limit signs is a major priority on training rides.

A punctured tubular is something you fix.

You have done a comprehensive investigation of the wicking, cooling and thermal properties of the 40 or 50 different fabrics cycling clothes are made from.

You belong to the "Nutritional Supplement Of The Week" club.

You regularly write letters to the editor of various bike magazines.

Reading Velo-News cover-to-cover is a given.

Baseball, hockey, football and basketball all suck.

You had heard something about somebody hitting a bunch of home runs, or something, a year or so ago. Something about a record.

People with weird tan lines make up your circle of friends.

You know Lance Armstrong’s middle name.

The words "Holy Land" refer to the Campy factory in Italy.

You can talk bottom bracket lubrication for hours.

Joe Dimaggio, Bart Starr, Bob Cousy, Gordie Howe, Willie Mosconi, Mark Spitz; you don’t know why these people are famous.

You own a piece of furniture made from bike parts.

You know where to buy a long sleeve Lycra jersey. (Please tell me - 868-9921.)

Over 75% of your mail has a bike wheel somewhere on it.

You know the location of every convenience store within 100 miles of your home.

Fine art is a foldout from Velo-News taped to the wall of your basement.

Your knowledge of rural country roads is greater than that of the farmers who live there.

Look pedals easily beat out the airplane, computers, and man landing on the moon as the techno achievement of the century.

You spend hours scanning the Sunday paper TV listings for anything cycling-related.

You know the complete history of the Presta valve.

Cycling ads never lie or stretch the truth.

You have an autographed cycling cap collection.

You talk cycling so much that your family understands the principles behind lacing and trueing a wheel.

$50 for this year’s latest and greatest chain is not a problem.

You thought of yourself as the big winner when the divorce settlement gave you the bikes and your wife only got the house and cars.

You go postal when the only coverage of the Tour, in the paper, is a 2" X 2" square under the bowling results.

The words, "promised land", refer to the pavé of the Paris-Roubé.

Teflon and/or Kevlar reinforced socks are a bargain at $20 a pair.

USCF and NORBA bill collectors hound you constantly.

Aero water bottles are a "must have."

You are so starved for cycling entertainment that you watch BMX on ESPN2.

Last Updated 03/19/08